Rose Colored Glasses

Normally I steer away from ‘selfies’ or photos that tend to give away my location or view of my children. But I have a message with this one. The place where I work the women are always giving back-handed compliments or talking about each other or something else equally unnecessary. Rarely do they give compliments or try to build each other up. Why? I have no idea. It’s as if they are in competition or it’s just easier to tear each other down. I see it in there faces every day. The ones that have triumphed over someone else with words and the ones that tried to make it through another day.

I have intervened a few times and went to our managing supervisor who does SQUAT about any of it. We do not have an HR department since the ENTIRE factory is run by the founding family (that’s a huge problem in itself) and worker’s happiness and wellbeing is often overlooked. I do my best to give compliments when I can or introduce myself to the new girls that get hired on instead of speculating and jumping right into the gossip about them (yup, small-town mentality). Let’s just say it’s a freaking snake pit where I work.

Yesterday, I wore the awesome glasses that I ordered online from Zenni. I’ve always wanted a pair and fully plan on purchasing sunglasses in this style. I got a couple of, ‘nice glasses are they new?’ comments but then one woman had to give a back-handed compliment. I was just returning some paperwork when she said, ‘Oh, you’re brave.’ I stopped. ‘Brave?’ and she had said, ‘For wearing those,’ as she pointed to my face. Here’s where I would have brooded over this and probably never worn them again. I’m not trying to be brave, I’m trying to a happy me and these glasses make me SUPER happy. I just smiled and walked away. Walking through the office, passing by her she said, ‘I guess I’m just going to have to get used to them.’ OK, this is where I stopped and turned. ‘I don’t care what you think or how you feel about my choice of eyewear style. You did not pay for them NOR are they on YOUR face. You can continue to belittle me but it won’t change a thing other than my opinion about you. Now I just think you’re a bully and mean bitter woman that’s jealous. Instead of trying to tear people down try a compliment instead.’ I walked away and enjoyed a quiet day because she chose not to talk to me.

Instead of people trying to tear each other down try encouragement, compliment, or some sort of supportive comment. It WILL go a long way!

Happy Thursday! Side note…SUPER happy about my selfie with the mirror and camera and how it kind of goes on a bit. YAY getting better with practice. This does not count as my 365 Day Project image.

 

 

New Years *Realistic* Planning

WOW! 2019 already around the corner! I was looking through some of my posts from last year and I set the bar really high for myself throughout the ENTIRE year. I started A LOT of projects and FAILED at almost all of them. I analyzed what I did wrong. It was basically me reaching for the stars while working a 40-hour job and a full-time second job as wife and mother. I’m going to try and keep it simple. I want to be as successful as possible and ran across this article that suggests ‘why’ people are not successful with their resolutions.

First I needed to do some ‘house cleaning’ for my blog. My poor Fenton project didn’t really go anywhere but I didn’t delete the project altogether. I also removed ‘I Survived the A to Z 2018’ image from my sidebar. That was a brutal task but I proud of myself for completing it. I might participate again this year but that could be a no-no from the no-no resolution list. After the ‘house cleaning’ I read through the list again and need to make sure I do these things:

  1. Make goals specific and to include a time frame.
  2. Do not be overly ambitious (more than I can handle-umm…I’m notorious for that as Y’all well know)
  3. Believe that I can complete my goal
  4. Have some with instant gratification and/or results
  5. Have a record of progress (blog)
  6. Make the list

My goal list started out as basically every run of the mill resolution. I want to be happier, lose weight, reduce stress and be more creative. Sounds like a basic list that I would BOMB within a month. I already quit smoking and I’m currently working on losing weight. I decided to break things down a bit more:

  • Work on being happy
    -Unplug (no phone after 5pm)
    -Do something that makes ME happy
  • Meet my goal weight this year
    -I have 22lbs to lose
    -Eating healthy falls in this category (this isn’t a goal)
    -Being more active also falls into this category (this isn’t a goal)
  • Write More
    -Produce one story 50 words or more a week
    -Have deadline
    -Could be about anything
  • Continue learning Asatru and Heathenism
    -Continue reading and participating in my kindred’s book club meetings
    -Study the Havamal
    -Be mindful of Asatru dates of importance
    -Participate more with Kindred events.
  • Draw more
    -Create a simple comic character
    -Produce one comic weekly
    -Keep it simple
  • 365 Day Project
    -Still, need to decide on a subject (HELP! I don’t know which one: create my own color pallets OR cell photography with the use of extra lenses. Opinions and thoughts are greatly appreciated!)
  • Express me more…be more social-ish
    -Express my feelings and speak more

This seems like a lot but when I break it down, it really isn’t. Instant gratification comes from the daily project which also serves as another objective-portfolio 365-day project that I need. Writing more is something that I have slacked on A LOT! I have a deadline and a minimum word count. Drawing more will fall under last years goal of creating my own little comic. The difference is that I have a deadline and some criteria such as KEEP IT SIMPLE! Nothing to elaborate and I’ve already started simple sketching planning my character. Finding my happiness is through ALL these goals. Continuing my Asatru Heathen path brings me peace and helps me work on mindfulness. Unplugging is something that is greatly needed and will help me unwind at night. All of this ALSO needs a schedule. Without one I’m surely going to fail.

What are your resolutions this year? How are you tackling them to achieve some level of success?

6 Word Story: 8/12

I use today’s prompt word like it is second nature but haven’t really thought much of the definition. I think I have even used it in a few work emails. I also think that it a word that can be used in both reassuring and threatening ways. I’m running super behind but have a lot planned for today and tomorrow. My son is even joining me in writing one of his own stories.

The more I thought about this prompt the more I realized that it has taken me a long time to even accept who I am as a person. It’s tough living up to everyone expectations and beating myself up about who I am not or what a failure I am. I’m trying to turn that around.


Prompt: Insure

Guarantee your happiness; love yourself unconditionally. 

 

6 Word Story: 7/28

I was (still am) full of excitement as we are attending a festival today. Normally, I don’t care to be around people, my anxiety almost forbids it. But today is different, they are like-minded and arent’ judgmental. I’m actually going to take along my watercolors to test the waters if I feel comfortable enough to paint with possible onlookers.

I readied myself for my walk when I noticed approaching the local track that the stadium lights were on and tents were being set up…ugh that’s right! The Bugle Mouth tournamanet is today as well. Outsiders from all over ascend on the town and are even more jerks than the people that live here. I’m still an outsider here after 7 years. I seen movement then people running and knew immediately that there was no way my fat ass is going to speed walk in front of all those fit people. Instead I stuck to the sidewalks and put my steps/time in and came home.

My husband hates when I walk the neighboorhood and is seriously creeped out by a guy-but I’ve never seen him. He said, ‘That’s the problem. You don’t see him but I do.’ Now, I’m getting fitted for a new holster for my carry conceal and yoga pants. I know, I’m rambling but it’s a cross between adrenaline and happiness-something I haven’t felt in a while. Busy day of festivities and catching up on my paintings. Happy Saturday everyone!


Prompt Word: Hostility

 

Micro Thoughts

When I was little, I often thought about the insects in the yard and how life was for them being so small. Did they have school? Did insect parents go to work? Do they have fun? Or were their lives just simple daily tasks for survival? I would watch them in wonderment trying to figure them out. Now that I am older, a mom, wife, and employed, I understand. Their lives are no different from ours. We complete daily tasks for our survival (this includes my art and writing). Even we are micro in size compared to the universe.


I wanted to keep my response to the Discover Prompt: Micro, to 99 words challenging myself to write today (even at work). I was feeling ‘blah’ yesterday but writing brings me personal happiness and I’m trying to stay positive.

6 Word Story: 2/13

I had so much joy last night from my many failures and final follow-through with the watercolor that I thought this was fitting. I am actually smiling. Not a, ‘I’m ok smile so please go away so I don’t have to explain CPTSD’ smile but a genuine smile. Something not done in a long time from being creative.


Prompt: Full Jar

Swish, scrape, swish; dip to rinse.

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